I
recently wrote about how dangerous it is to tell people that “meeting makers
make it”. However, Alcoholics Anonymous is filled with various clichés that do ring
true for me. Some of my favourites are:
SLIP: Sobriety Loses It’s Priority
Nothing Changes if Nothing Changes
It works if you work it and you’re worth it so work
it.
If you hang around a barbershop long enough you’re
going to get a haircut
The
barbershop cliché is a great segue into the one I wanted to address. People,
places and things. During a meeting the other day someone said they couldn’t
control people, places and things. I totally disagree with that statement. I
have control over the people I hang out with, the places I hang out at and the
things I surround myself with.
When
I got into recovery I had to make some big changes (see cliché above). I
changed the people I hung around. I wasn’t judging them or casting aspersions
on them but they were detrimental to my recovery. A week out of my last
treatment centre, a little over two months into recovery, I was driving home
from a meeting and a car beside me started honking, the driver motioning for me
to pull over. I figured it was someone from AA so I pulled over. It turned out
it was a former crack dealer asking me if I wanted something. I said no thanks
and that was it. I told that story to someone and they asked me if I told him
off. I responded by saying no, up to a little while ago I’d been avidly seeking
him out. He didn’t know I wasn’t interested in anymore and there was no need to
get nasty. I started surrounding myself with AA people. I had a few close
friends that I talked to daily. My first year I went to this coffee shop every
night. There was a group of AAers who went there after meetings. We talked
about recovery but also just chatted about every day stuff. I began to feel
good in my new social setting realizing that I didn’t have to drink to fit in.
Lastly,
I chose what types of things I have in my life. I don’t have bongs on my
mantle. I don’t have fluorescent beer sign on my wall. Etc. Etc.
Through
the 12 Steps I gained freedom. While active in my alcoholism and addiction I
had no freedom. I was controlled by my higher power – alcohol/drugs – and did
everything for it. Having lost the obsession over alcohol and mind altering
substances I now have the freedom to make my own choices. I also have to face
the consequences if those choices are wrong.
Dave
the Dude
