I’m an avid talk radio listener and this past week
one of the show hosts was opining over the growing trend of people always being
late. As a recovered alcoholic/addict I feel it is part of my recovery to
always (barring something beyond my control) be on time. When I tell someone
I’m going to meet them at a certain time that is a commitment I have made. To
be late is breaking that commitment. I broke enough commitments when I was
active in my addiction and I have no desire to return to that way of life.
Many will read this and say it’s no big deal – that
it’s just a little thing and will not affect one’s recovery either way. I beg
to differ. I firmly believe that there is no little things when it comes to the
12 Steps’ design for living. I must practice the 12 Step principles in all my
affairs. This includes being on time.
It also includes making my bed in the morning. Some
would ask “why make your bed if you’re going to mess it up again at night? No
one is going to see it”. I make my bed because I respect myself and I deserve to
retire at night in a neatly made bed. For me, and I only speak for myself, it
feels better going to sleep in a made up bed than a messy one. I also try to
keep myself neat in appearance. Not that I don’t lounge around in track pants
on my days off work, but when I’m out and about I wear clean regular pants and shirts.
Now, I’m not walking around in a suit and tie all day. I wear T-shirts and
jeans for the most part but they’re not the clothes I slept in. I suit up and
show up as the old timers taught me.
I do my best not to swear up a storm. When I was
active in my addiction I swore a lot. As a person in recovery I’m trying to
lead a different type of life and therefore speak in a civil manner. I’m not perfect
as the Big Book tells us, “it’s progress rather than perfection” and I swear
here and there (especially when I’m driving) but I swear much less than I used
to.
Other little things that I do are: let other drivers
in when they signal to change lanes; return money if I’m given too much change;
be polite to those I encounter be they friend, family, stranger or foe; respect
my elders; respect myself; don’t take things personally (and the three other
Agreements via don Miguel Ruiz); don’t let dishes pile up in my sink; etc.
The way I was living when active in my addiction
didn’t happen all at once. The toxicity of that life snuck up on me one little
thing at a time until the unlivable became livable, the noxious lifestyle
became the norm. If I let the little things slip then eventually I may let my
sobriety slip (SLIP: Sobriety Loses Its Priority) and I’ll return to a life of
degradation.
Dave the Dude
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